today I failed myself. I told myself to eat today the you won’t eat for a week. whatever that was the last time I am ever talking myself into eating. I’m not going to bother to weigh myself today. I go to new york Monday so I won’t eat then and we get back Thursday then Friday I get my wisdom teeth out so I won’t have to eat for 3-5 days! yippie so if I start over tommrow that will be 10-12 days without eating! then I’m gonna start going to the gym and not eating when I feel better! I’m excited!:)
just weighed myself at 137. already lost 3 pounds!
i went to the gym for 2 hours then sat in the sauna for 20 minutes. i couldn’t handle 3 hours, but i am going to work my way up to it. i also get very bored at the gym. i haven’t weighed myself yet.
Weighed myself today.
140, i couldn’t believe it. i haven’t been this weight in almost a year. it was very depressing, but it did open my eyes to what i want and how to get it. this time is for real. no more giving up, no more saying i will start tommrow. this is it. this is the day my life will change forever. i plan on losing 60 pounds. because that is what will make me happy. and i plan on doing it in less then 3 months. i am gonna starve myself. and it will work i have done it before. i did only lose 10 pounds, but it did only take 5 days. i also didnt workout last time i did it, and i am going to workout this time. 7 times a week, 3 hours a day. and if i cant go for 3 hours, then at least 1 hour. no matter what. and i had a realization today. food is actually quite disgusting when you think about it. it has never done anything for me execpt cause me to gain weight, breakout, loose hope, and make me depressed. so goodbye food. this is my parting to you. i can’t and won’t ever be there for you again.( yes i will eat when it is ABSOULTLY necessary, but other then that, no. ) my goal weight is 80 pounds. i am 5’3” so that is a common weight for my height. when i reach it i am going to eat only fruits and veggies, and only water from now on till i die. i want to be at least 100 pounds by the time school starts, which is in 47 days. my parents might get suspicous but i think i can throw them off. also i am going to new york with only my mom next week and she will be too busy to notice i am not eating. then on the 20 i am getting my wisdom teeth out so for 3-5 days i wont even be able to eat! so yay for that! then when school starts i can bring a lunch and throw it away! easy as that…
well hopefully it works out! i am gonna blog my workout and weigh in every day.
Tuesday-chips and salsa, grapes, cheese, goldfish, m&ms, 2 fruit twists
^ was a really bad thing and wont happen again, i promise you that.
havent written anything in awhile but I starved myself Saturday and Sunday last weekend then ate Monday-Thursday and didn’t eat yesterday and haven’t eaten anything today. I hope I can continue to starve on.
haven’t eaten in two days! yaaay. now just 12 more days to go… started my period. thanks mother nature. appreciate it!
okay. so i ate like you wouldn’t believe today. i can’t even say what all i ate. it’s so stupid. well i’m staying up all night to burn off a few extra calories. then i am getting up early and going for a run. then i am not eating for the next two weeks!
i hate myself but i’m staying up all night to burn off some extra calories. also i am starting my only water diet today. which my be a little hard because it’s my sisters birthday and we have to go out to eat. but i will just say that i don’t feel good or something..